Saturday, 7 April 2012

The Marksman

Right, this is something I have been working on for a little while now, and it is by no means finished nor anywhere near the quality I want, but I just wanted to put it out there and get a little bit of feedback, good or bad, I really need anything! If you think its crap tell me!! The two extracts are very different but I would love any feedback on my writing style, the language I use, spelling and grammar....Literally ANYTHING!! Thank you :)

EXTRACT 1

In the seven years Jess had known Matt she had never seen him like this before. Walking to his side she put her hand gently on his shoulder.
     “Matt…” she said softly “Do you want to talk”
Matt lifted his head and looked deep into her eyes. So many times he had confided in her, so many times he had told her things he thought he would never tell anyone. He trusted her more than he had ever trusted anyone in his life. But this was different; this was about James, her colleague, her friend. This was something he couldn’t tell her. “Matt…” she said again. Matt nodded. A silent response to so many unanswered questions. “Shall we go in your office?” Matt nodded again. Jess hated seeing him like this, these cases always affected him the most and it broke her heart to see the usually cheerful man, walking round with his head down, barely eating and certainly not sleeping. Taking him by the hand she led him into his office, turning on the lights as she did so. Matt took the seat behind the over crowed desk as Jess took the one in front of it. She sat silently as Matt flicked through the papers; she didn’t want to push him in to saying anything so she just watched him. Finally Matt found what he was looking for, opening the folder, he placed it on the desk and spun it round for Jess to read. Leaning forward as Matt fell backwards, she picked up the folder and started to read, Matt eyes constantly searching her face for any signs of a reaction. “Where’s the tape” Matt reached into his draw and pulled out a small cassette. Jess’s face went a slight shade of red as her eyes searched the room. “I didn’t know you cameras in here.”


On working with Children and Animals


Many of you will have heard this phrase being thrown around and I can now officially confirm its importance! Many of you may be already aware that I am training to be a Primary School teacher, working specifically with Early Year, but I also help to run a number of Drama Productions, usually at the end of term. This Easter term was no different!

A very good friend of mine who I have worked with extensively over the past 5 years, not only on the drama side of things but also within the classroom, was running a primary school production of Annie. (Not an easy feat for 1 man and a cast of 30+ kids under the age of 11!) This included acting, singing, choreography and all else in-between. Now this may sound impressive, and believe me it is, but after 5years of doing similar things, he found need to "Up the ante" this year. Those of you familiar with Annie may recall she adopts a dog called Sandy, and after the initial fear that yours truly would once again be strapped into a cardboard contraption, and placed on stage in a sweltering body-hugging costume, weighing in at a whopping 8-10 kgs (as per Little Shop of Horrors last year where I was the amazing AudreyII) it was decided auditions would be held for an actual dog.

Cue the dress rehearsal and the child in the lead role of Annie having a phobia of dogs. Not the best of starts. However after a good few hours, and countless treats later (not just for the dog!) We were getting somewhere, a reasonably well training Dog and a kid with growing confidence. Brilliant! Nothing could possibly go wrong now...right?

Wrong, fast forward to show time, after countless technical difficulties involving a lighting system which would put many of the clubs in Newcastle to shame and a mixing desk, with a seemingly random assortment of knobs and dials, it was time to welcome to the stage the surprise guest, Daisy the Dog who, coincidentally, was afraid of loud noises. Rapturous applause and much "aww-ing" accompanied the terrified dog to stage. Promptly sitting down and refusing to move for the rest of the scene. Not even copious tempting with delicious doggy treat could stop her attempting to bolt back to her rightful owner! I say attempting because the poor dog was on a lead being held by the also terrified Annie, the poor child having her arm jerked back and forward by the escaping dog! The situation was eventually settled by the owner lying practically across the stage offering words of encouragement and more treats!

So take heed, and make sure you are aware of exactly what you are letting yourself in for when you sign up to work with both animals and children in the same medium!

UA